Car Seat Experts

When we registered with Babies 'R' Us several months ago, the representative in the registry department explained about the various workshops and seminars that they hold at the store, so when it came time to install our infant car seat in the Subaru, I figured I would take advantage and attend the car seat seminar.  I'm a fairly bright person, so I originally thought I wouldn't need any instruction...I can read a manual perfectly well.  But I figured why not?  I certainly don't have the experience that they do, and there's something to be said for experience.

Ever the prepared one, I had stopped at home to grab a bite to eat prior to heading out to the store.  While home, I also found time to start reading through the car seat manual.   I was just going to show up on Tuesday night, but Jenn called ahead and registered me.  Thank goodness, else they might have had only one instructor for the three other attendees.  With me there, they had two.  I had gone in with the impression that they would be providing instruction on how to install car seats.  After all, it was explained to me that you could take car seats out into the parking lot and test fit them prior to buying one. 

The seminar started with the four of us waiting for ten minutes.  We were told that one of the salespeople was looking for a safety video and TV.  When that salesperson returned, it turned out that they didn't have such a video.  This was a sign of things to come.

One of the instructors was male, 45-50 yrs old, the other a female, 25-30 yrs old.  I got the impression that the younger one was an "instructor-in-training" based on the dynamics between them.  Within the first 30 seconds of her speaking, I knew I was in the wrong place.  The seminar has nothing to do with car seat installation, and everything to do with car seat selection, not to mention selection of booster seats and strollers.  Jenn and I have all of that stuff already, so this seminar was not going to be of use to me in the slightest.  I was faced with a decision: be polite and sit through the 30 min. long seminar, or get up and leave.  For only 30 minutes, I didn't want to insult anyone, so I sat there.  I was ticked that I didn't anticipate this to be a sales pitch, but it was my fault.

Then she started describing the car seats they had and how some of them differed.  She grabbed the Graco Snugride 32 and started pointing out some features.  Great, I thought...this is our car seat.  She asks, "Ok, trivia question...in what position should the handle be placed when in the vehicle.  I knew the answer for two reasons.  Jenn had just explained to me over dinner that the handle is suppose to be down, according to her friend with a 16-month old daughter, and I had just read over dinner in the manual that the handle was to be down.   Confidently, I said, "all the way down."  "No," she said.  "It's supposed to be up, so it will [act as a roll bar in an accident.]"  "Not according to the manual for that seat, which I just read an hour ago, " I said.  The older guy intervened and said he will look into it.  Strike two. 

She was completely ad-libbing the seminar, and half of her sentences trailed off in incoherent phrases "like, ya know," and, "the stuff on this seat is just really good stuff.  It's convenient and stuff like that."  Strike three.  Not only was the seminar nothing but a sales pitch, it was one of the most poorly executed sales pitches I've ever encountered.  As they moved onto to booster seats and strollers, the comedy of errors continued.  Questions asked could not be answered, and there were several "watch this" demonstrations with the seats and strollers (think Empire Strikes Back when Han Solo is about to engage the hyperdrive, but it does nothing but sputter and fail).  The seminar lasted over an hour.  I felt sorry for the other "students" and future students of this class.